Dog Walking By The Sea.

 

Hey everyone just a short one today, I thought I would just share a few pictures from a nice walk I had with my dad today by the sea near where I live.

 

 

I love walking my dog on my own usually it gives me a little time to think about what's going on in my life and the world around me. When you look out at the sea its like you think of a whole new life and what could come with it. I often find myself thinking of the future and after a walk like one of these I feel a lot better weather I was having a bad day or not.

 

 

 

Like I said at the start I went with my dad, it was nice to go for a long walk with him as we talked over a lot of things that I probably wouldn't have said if we were with other people. Its good to have quality time with your parents and at the end of the day I don't think many people my age (20)do see enough of their parents. 

 

 

 Now I hope your all getting off the internet now and have gone to tell your mum and dad how you want to spend more time with them :)

 

 

YOU
ONLY
LIVE
ONCE

 

 

Love and appreciate those around you <3

 

Thanks for reading
Emma
xoxo






Cheating.

Once a cheat, always a cheat?
Do you think people that cheat can really change? Why do people even cheat in the first place? My views on cheating is that if you are not happy in the relationship your in then don't be in it anymore! You owe the person your with to tell them your true feelings? What's the point in carrying on stringing them along while your sleeping with someone else behind their back?
Cheating is often something that is on my mind when I was 6 my dad was cheating on my mum and they had been together for 13 years.. My dad claims he met her on the train and they 'accidentally' switched phones and he picked hers up instead of his. I don't think I believe this totally I am not sure what to believe. I can remember a lot about it all he would say his friend Dave was on the phone and wanted to talk to me and my brother at the age of 6 I thought it generally was Dave but was told soon after that it was his 'other women'!

One day out of the blue my dad told my mum and from that day there is a broken part of my heart that will never be filled. In an ideal world we all want both our parents together and for the grass always to be greener on the other side, well that's not the case.
As a 6 year old and my brother at 8 its hard to see your dad sleeping on the sofa your mum crying all the time not really sure why your daddy is taking you out with another lady? It was all very confusing and when I was younger I was very much a daddies girl (I still am now but of course I love my mum to bits) and when he eventually moved out after a couple months of a lot of tention and awkward moments it was hard not having him around not seeing him everyday come in from work. What was even harder was hearing my mum cry at night. Id lay in my bed still a little confused wondering why dad wasn't coming home and why mum was crying all the time.
I think in the end we got used to only seeing him only on the weekends although I would run to the end of the drive crying my eyes out watching him drive away it was always hard to watch him go knowing I would have to wait another week to see him.
Like I said at the start if your not happy in the relationship then leave! Think about your actions and what you are going to put people through because if you have children it will not only break their mums heart but your kids too. I will never forget what my dad did to my mum.. to me my mum and brother, they were happily married. I have forgiven him now though and its kind of bad karma I suppose because he is still with the women who he cheated on my mum with and is in a very unhappy marriage.. yes they married -_- I don't know why.. and he often tells me that he wishes he didn't marry her.
Some men just cant keep it in their pants and I think that's sad married or just in a relationship its still a promise to the person that your with that you are 'exclusive' and only with them.
I know its not just men that cheat women do too but anyone male or female.. just think about what it could do to your wife husband/girlfriend boyfriend and even your children.
Enough of this little kind of 'rant' but I am very strongly opinionated when it comes to cheating.. If this has happened to you and your reading this just know that it is hard at the end of the day but the important thing in the end that you need to learn to do is to forgive.

Thanks for reading
Emma
xoxo

Would YOU Want To Be Famous?

What is it really to be famous? What do I know, the truth is I obviously don't know anything about what its like to be famous but I am sure we've all thought what if? How would you cope? Would it be ok for a while? Then you wish it never happened and want your old life back? Be embarrassed if it only lasts a day or happy that it came even if only for a moment?

There is a few who want to be exactly like celebrities is it to do with jealousy? Is it to do with the 'love' we have for the celebrity? Maybe its our desperation to be noticed! Or to even have what seems like unlimited money? I am sure its nice for celebrities who have always wanted to make a difference, to be know for something and for people to look up to them.
When the fame comes is it really what they expected though? Being followed all the time asked for pictures all the time even on your 'insecure days' for the women because I am sure if your a female reading this you will agree that most/all women have these days!

What do you think of how harsh the media can be to some celebrities? Does it make you think well they wanted the fame that's what comes with it? I am torn when it comes to the 'hate' side of fame. What I mean by this is that I do agree that to a certain extent they have asked for fame so they should learn to deal with what comes with it. What I don't agree with and I also think is shocking that some celebrities get death threats, nasty things shouted at them in the streets.. disgusting comments on social media and being told how they should or shouldn't be acting etc..

At the end of the day were all still human and nobody deserves to get that surely? Even with all the security and entourages they have with them I am sure it can still be scary sometimes and they can feel unsafe just to know that there is people out there that hate them! Now hate is a very strong word as my nan told me once when I was younger.. I believe it is and we all use it way too lightly!

What's the purpose to this post? Its the subject that I often think about when I watch The Only Way Is Essex, Teen Mom & especially Keeping Up With The Kardashians you see them getting followed all the time by fans and paparazzi (I know the paparazzi are doing their job but I've watched how intense they can get and I feel scared for them sometimes especially when they are chasing the celebrities car!). Even in some peoples music you can tell that they aren't dealing with fame as well as some.

There is not much privacy for celebrities and I know this comes with their celebrity status. But there's people out there who like their own space celebrity or not, I know I do.. So before you write a nasty comment on a video or on social media think of how you could make someone feel if they actually read it. I know most celebrities have learned to block it out and let it go over their head. I am sure they read it sometimes though I know I would like to know what's being said about me good or bad.

Thanks for reading
Emma
xoxo

A Women's Best Friend.

 

 

This post is going to be about my dog Tilly.
When my mum had split from my stepdad in 2010 and we moved house I said to my mum that I wanted a dog. A couple of months after being there, if I am being honest I was feeling very lonely as this was the time me and my friends drifted apart and I became very unsociable and didn't want to do the same things we always did we live in a small village and once you've done the same thing day in day out it can get boring for some. I wanted 'a friend' as cliché and sad as that sounds I wanted someone to be there with me when I was feeling alone.

My mum wasn't too sure at first I think this may have been because I had only ever had goldfish as a pet before. After 5 months of being there she said I could and I spoke to my dad and he said he would get me a dog for my birthday which was a couple of months later. I was so excited and started looking online for a puppy!

 

My first breed of choice was a Yorkshire terrier I looked around and found a few but carried on looking. On the day I found Tilly I was just browsing over a few advertisement sites and then saw the picture of her!! I thought she was adorable and when I read what it said underneath I was even more pulled in, the advertisement read something like this..
"1year old female Chihuahua X Jack Russell for sale. I am selling as I have just got a full time job and I live in a caravan and I don't think its fair for her to be kept locked up inside a small space all day"

I felt bad for the women because it seemed she really loved her and was doing the best thing for her. We called the number and a couple of hours later the lady came to our house with her, she ran round like a lunatic haha and was really energetic and excited and even ended up showing that by peeing in the dining room (hahahaha).
Me and my mum fell in love with her and the lady said she felt confident that we would be a good new family for her, but she had already arranged to meet with a few other people too.. so we waited with anticipation and the lady got back to us and said she was ours if we still wanted her (of course we did) and that she would drop her off at the end of the week.
I immediately got on the phone to my dad and he agreed to pay for her as a early birthday present and I can tell you now she is the best birthday present I have ever got or will ever get.

To people who haven't had a dog don't really understand how attached you get and how you feel bad every time you leave them alone in the house.. I must admit we have spoilt her and she is a very clingy dog and does get a little sad when we go to put our shoes on but when we get back no matter how long we have been she hasn't made a mess on the floor (only when she's been ill and we haven't left her for that long when she has been) or ruined anything she is just asleep on the sofa or in her bed.

Tilly is honestly the most amazing and loyal friend ever! I know she's a dog but she is the only one that has been there to lick away my tears or lay with me when I am sad and do goofy things to make me laugh (without trying obviously) I honestly think she can sense when there is something wrong and she is always by my side!

 

I never thought I would love a dog this much and didn't really understand why people got so attached to pets but its true they are a part of your family and I don't know what I would do without her now!

To my best friend Tilly.. Thank You <3

*This may be a little cheesy but I don't care because everything I have said about this truly amazing dog is honest*



Thanks for reading
Emma
xoxo

You Were Born An Original Dont Die A Copy!

 

The main thing that used to bug me when I was younger was other people not having a mind of their own! They would copy things i do or things i say and I suppose in one way some people could look at that as you should be flattered but for me it was just annoying!

Like you buy a nice top and they like it so much they get it too.. that's fine until your out in your friend group and its like a episode of who wore it best!
Or when you get a haircut and someone copies the same colour and cut!!! Its like ok.. I can still be OK with this.. but you just think I made a change to myself because I wanted to be different. Not necessarily stand out just be different and then when someone does the same thing as you it can be really annoying for you right? is it not just me that was thinking like this when we were younger?

 

After a while what do you do? There's all your friends looking more or less the same and there's nothing to make you different anymore.. (its almost as if its started to be like in American films when theres the stereotype groups of jocks goths emos geeks..etc etc) unless you take a whole new approach and do something completely the opposite your not going to win are you. So your stuck.. Looking the same.

Sorry for this little kind of 'rant' but this was on my mind today! People copy each other all the time, I think sometimes its allowed and acceptable but for those who started it surely they feel just how I felt when I was younger and sometimes feel today.

There's this quote I've seen going around
"You Were Born An Original, Don't Die A Copy"
- John Mason






I think certain people need to read that and think about what they do or how they act before they go do something.. you may even regret not being your own person when your older and look back. You'll wish you didn't follow the crowd and done things your own way. Its like when people copy other people's hard work when they are writing a book or something! Just use what's in your own head.. look at other people for examples and inspiration.. But not to copy!

Thanks For Reading
Emma
xoxo

 

 

 

Top 25 Most Played Songs.

1.Blink 182 - I Miss You
2.Avril Lavigne - Wish You Were Here
3.Demi Lovato - In Case
4.Sarah McLaughlin - In The Arms Of An Angel
5.Leona Lewis - Angel
6.Ellie Goulding - Explosions
7.Jessie J - I Miss Her
8.Ellie Goulding - Burn
9. Ellie Goulding - How Long Will I Love You
10.James Arthur - Youre Nobody 'Till Somebody Loves You
11.James Arthur - Get Down
12.James Arthur - Recovery
13.James Athur - Is This Love?
14.Katy Perry - This Is How We Do
15.Katy Perry - Teenage Dream
16.Leona Lewis - Run
17.Adele - Someone Like You
18.Little Mix - Salute
19.Taylor Swift - 22
20.Katy Perry - The One That Got Away
21. Boys Like Girls - Me, You And My Medication
22.Nickleback - If Today Was Your Last Day
23.Nicki Minaj - Pound The Alarm
24.Wilkinson - Afterglow
25.Pink - Just Give Me A Reason


Here is my 25 most played songs to date. Do you listen to them? What artists do you like to listen to? Do you have any suggestions of what I should be listening to? This obviously isn't all I listen to but I thought id share my favourite/most played songs with you (:

Thanks for reading
Emma
xoxo

5 Films I LOVE!

 

Hi everyone today I am going to tell you all 5 films I really like (sort of a short review about each) i think you can tell a lot about a person from the films they watch. Also if you haven't seen them it might give you a nice idea of what to watch one night. Get cosy, a nice hot drink and for some.. a box of tissues then watch :).

1. Titanic.
 

If your not into long films this one is not for you, its about 3 hours long. Im sure most people have seen titanic. Its an amazing roamance/very dramatic film based on a true story with the main characters called Rose & Jack played by Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio, Directed by James Cameron, released in 1997. I cry every time I watch this one as its such an emotional film and to think this is actually based on a true story is also very sad. 

 

 

 

2. Something Borrowed.

 

This film is a good chick flick! I related to this film in some ways and its nice when you watch something and think.. that's so me! It was released in 2011, produced by Hilary Swank and directed by Luke Greenfield. The story line is basically 2 friends Rachel played by Ginnifer Goodwin and Darcy played by Kate Hudson. Rachel is in love with the guy she went to university with his name is Dex played by Colin Egglesfield, one night she introduced him to her best friend Darcy and she decided she liked him and they ended up being together! (poor Rachel) anyway the whole film is Rachel seeing he best friend with the man she's in love with until she wins him back unintentually in the end.

 

3. Angus Thongs And Perfect Snogging.

This film is one I watched a lot while I was about 14 (cant believe this was released in 2008-gone so quick), I still watch it now but I watched it over and over when I was that age. Some girls in mid teens don't have much luck with the 'love' side of life, your still learning. This film explains all things boys and what some girls go through when they are in their teens and does a really good job of showing that. Its funny, sad and you really invest in the main character (well I did anyway..) Georgia played by Georgia Groome this is hilarious and a lovely film!

 

 4.Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2.

This film was the perfect ending of the saga and I'm sad its ended as are most other fans of the films i should think. Yet again this is very romantic and does play on your heart strings abit! Starring main characters Bella played by Kristen Stewart, Edward played by Robert Pattinson and Jacob played by Taylor Lautner. This film is about vampire's and Werewolves released in 2012. If your not into mythical films then this may not be your cup of tea but if you haven't seen the films I recommend you watch them from the start, im sure you wont be disappointed. 

 

 

 

5. The Perfect Man

This film is one of my all time favourites! I don't know how many times ive seen this! Its a romantic comedy directed by Mark Rosman, released in 2005. Starring Hilary Duff who played Holly and Heather Locklear who played Jean (Holly's mum). The film is about a daughter who is fed up of moving around because of her mums love life, She didn't like having to move every time it didn't work out for her mum then to have a new house, leave old friends and start over all the time. She took things into her own hands and tried to help her mum with her love life (without her knowing) so she could stay where she was for a while. Its a very good romantic comedy, I love Hilary Duff and if you are also a fan and haven't seen it already go watch it!

Ok! So I've just realised all of these films are in the 'Romantic' category, this was not intended at all but if im being honest theres nothing I like watching more than a good chick flick ( I do like to watch the odd horror sometimes) im a sucker for romance and a right softy at heart so to those who know me this might not be a surprise that its ended up like this. If you like romantic films and you haven't seen any of these then watch them and let me know what you thought of it in a comment.

Thanks for reading,
Emma
xoxo

 

 

Hard Times.

 

Ever feel like you don't fit in all of a sudden? I know everyone shouldn't be the same but its nice to feel like you belong somewhere. I am sure we've all had times when life doesn't go our way or we are just feeling very alone? For me this feels like quite a regular thing now :(
This might be a quite depressing post to read so if your having a good day I wouldn't read it :/
I got pregnant just before my 19th birthday this was not planned and I was very scared but so so excited. My boyfriend stuck by me 100% and that made me even more happy that we were going to be a family. My pregnancy started out fine but then I ran into some complications near the end. My urine tests kept coming back positive for protein and then the next time more and more kept showing up. They then found that my blood pressure was increasing and later they told me they thought I had pre-eclampsia.
I didn't really know what this meant and I wasn't informed properly about what this could do to me or my baby.

*There is a lot to this but this post is just to let you all know how im feeling now and to get an idea of why. I will be writing a separate post about my pregnancy and my baby eventually.*
I started to have on and off really bad headaches/migraines ,I felt tired literally all the time I know this comes with normal pregnancies too but I could have slept for a whole night and still be really tired throughout the day.
Pre-Eclampsia then turned into Eclampsia. I was in hospital in an induced coma, I had a placenta abruption and my brain/ whole body was really swollen because I had been fitting so much. I was on the intensive care ward for 3or4 days it was touch and go all I kept getting told when I woke up was "emma you almost died, they didn't think you was going to make it" hearing this didn't phase me at the time as I didn't feel like I almost died. All I wanted to know was where was my baby? I had a tube down my throat and I could hardly talk, I didn't know where I was and I was really scared I asked my mum "where's lily?"
My Mum and my boyfriend sat either side of the bed and my mum said lily didn't make it darling im so sorry.

At that point I just burst into tears I had no idea what had happened to me I was 34 and a half weeks pregnant and I was being told that my baby had died?
It was and still is very hard for me to come to terms with. To this day I am still horrified of how I felt in and when I came out of hospital I wasn't myself atall and It was hard for me to remember things.

When I come out of hospital the first few months was very hard for me I didn't want to go out I would get really anxious if I did and time would literally fly by I could be rambling on talking to someone for 2 hours and it would feel like 5minutes.
Although I had my amazing family and boyfriend around me I felt so alone.
I didn't want to talk to friends I would ignore their calls and texts.

Time went by and my cousin who I was very close to when I was younger was about to have her second baby when the pictures went up on facebook I felt extremely jealous. I felt really bad that I was feeling this way but there was nothing to stop it. She'd just given birth to her baby girl and all I was thinking is where is mine? why haven't I got my little girl here? why me? what have I done that's so bad that made me deserve this happening?
I am happy for my cousin and jealousy is not something I want to feel towards someone who I was once so close to after she had just done one of the most amazing things a women can do in life.
One of my friends was also pregnant and found out that she was having a girl and i also started to feel a lot of jealousy build up. Like with my cousin i was very happy for her (she is married and has a little boy already) to complete her family. But in my head im thinking to myself why couldn't things had gone right for me?
Now going to see my friends with children is hard sometimes because when i see them all i feel is i should be doing what they're doing right now.
I don't really have any proper friends without children so most days i am very reluctant to seeing them i just want to sit alone in my house doing whatever i want to do.. sitting watching Jeremy kyle, catching up with the soaps (haha) or just nothing.
I do have two part time jobs but I am looking for full time work ive gone to interviews wondering what im doing there and why im not at home looking after my now would have been 8months old little girl.
Life is really hard, when it trys to bring you down try not to let it (im still trying with this part) make the most of life because it could be taken away from you without any notice. Make sure the people you love know it and any regrets you have, what you've done or what you've said to someone tell them your sorry.

If you are pregnant and are told you have pre-eclampsia ask so many questions its not something you should take lightly. if you think they've done something wong ask them to do it again if you have any concerns ring the hospital/doctors if your not happy with theyre answer go to a&e literally do anything that you think will help because it is very seious. Even if your not pregnant I know you've read this and its helped you or for you to tell others if they are pregnant. This is the worst thing that has happened to me in my life and I honestly don't wish this on my worst enemy.
Always know no matter what the situation there is always someone who will be there if you need them it could be a stranger or even someone you know your not alone talk about it and you will feel better. Trust me.

Thanks For Reading
Emma
xoxo

My Hair Story

I'm sure if your a female reading this you will sure know what I mean! 

I remember the first time i coloured my hair I think I was about 13 my mum bought one of them highlighting caps (the one that makes you look like your about to go swimming haha) and a blonde hair dye to do 'blonde highlights'. I can't remember it making a big difference. 

The picture below was my natural hair colour before I had used any hair dye I was in my first year of high school in this picture I think.
 

A while later I decided I wanted brown hair it did come out brown but for my 13 year old self was not enough of a difference. 

From the age of 14 until I was 16/17 I decided I wanted black hair! I loved it. I went through that 'emo' faze and i put thick eyeliner on, make my face a very light matte finish and I'd wear a lot of black. My hair was very long and silky and looked healthy.  Below are some pictures of my hair when it was black.
 

 

Next I decided I wanted to go lighter again and remember this process well *DISCLAIMER* this destroyed my hair for the first time. I used the Jerome Russell bleach from superdrug. 

I think I must have bleached it about 4 or 5 times in 2 days ( yes very bad for my hair I was still 'learning') it went a very bright orange colour and I eventually gave up and ended up buying a really nice Mahogony colour which was fairly dark.

This didn't last long as I was determined to get light hair I tried the same method once again and ended up with really bright yellow toned blonde hair it did not Suit me and I hated it!

So there I go again off to superdrug and I decided is go bright red this time! The colour come out lovely (used Live Colour XXL) but faded fairly quickly. I then at that point had given up trying to do crazy things as my hair probably would have started to fall out I then just put a dark brown hairdye on and it was a nice brown/Red colour for about a year then, Somewhere in between I went a very dark brown with blonde under the front section I loved this and did have that for a while. Below is a few pictures of my hair when I had blonde under the front section. 

 

At the end of November 2013 I decided I wanted to go blonde again my hair had faded to a light brown and thought it would take well this time. 

Below is my hair before bleaching  in November. 
 

 

It didn't take that well and I was walking  with a orange toned blonde head for about 3 weeks it did tone down with a purple shampoo below is the result before I went to the hairdressers.
 

Around my birthday (December 2013)  I decided to go to the hairdresser.  Below is the end result after I went to the hairdressers (not a massive difference but in different lights you could see the difference. 

 

 

 

My hairdresser did wonders on my hair and it looked really nice. It probably stayed just over a month then I decided enough is enough with wanting to be light I had been fairly dark haired from when I first started dying my hair and felt almost not myself. 

Below is the most recent picture of me.
 

 

So yes I have had a lot of experience of dying my hair bad and good. What's your opinion on coloured hair is it worth it is it not? In my opinion I think you should try out a few not too many or you will end up with shorter damaged hair like me now :( haha but no if your thinking about dying your hair maybe try a semi permeant to start with and if you like it get a permeant one.

Thanks for reading.

Emma xoxo